Tea or Tears

Tea or Tears

I really wanted to make my T post one about Tea. My family's love of tea and my personal love of tea. But the closest I could come on this day is to take comfort in a cup of tea as I write about my tears.
I haven't written much about the coronavirus or its impact on our family. Mostly because it hasn't had as much of an impact on us as it has others. Although our college/high school aged children have lost their incomes, the major bread winners have continued to work and earn. All of our physical needs are being met. Due to the generosity of others towards us, we are able to be generous to others in our area who need the help. God is good.
Even so, there have been a few times that I have felt the strain of the changes in our world. Times the tears flowed unbidden and unrestrained.
Tears when our Governor put an end date on our stay-at-home order. A date that said my daughter's Senior prom and Graduation ceremony would be cancelled. A date that seems so far away; that adds weight to the heavy feeling of isolation.
Tears the first time I saw a friend in person, 6 ft away. Able to share a smile, but not a hug. A quick update in passing, rather than a cozy time of catching up over coffee.
Tears after some friends drove by, honked and waved from the street. We stood on the curb, desperately holding on to the fleeting moment of personal care shown by their going out of their way to drive by our house.
Tears as a I stuffed down the panic rising inside me when I went to work cleaning up after an Air BnB guest. Not knowing whether they had left any illness in the apartment. Reminding myself that there was more risk to going grocery shopping than in that apartment.
Tears this morning. My pastor giving an update on the future possibilities for our congregation to meet in person again. The bleary forecast that it may be up to a year before that can happen.
Tears as I type this.
Tears with my tea.